


Interview at a Playground

by AlmondRose



Series: Baby Bats [2]
Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Capes, Bruce is a good dad, Gen, Humor, Playgrounds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-27
Updated: 2016-07-27
Packaged: 2018-07-27 01:18:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7597792
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlmondRose/pseuds/AlmondRose
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lois scores an interview with Bruce Wayne, but she learns quite a bit more than expected....</p><p> </p><p>She had been expecting a restaurant, or maybe a side office, but she wasn’t expecting a playground.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Interview at a Playground

**Author's Note:**

> Dick and Babs are eleven  
> Jason is nine  
> Cass is eight  
> Tim is eight  
> Steph is seven  
> Damian is two

Bruce Wayne agrees to an interview, which surprises Lois. She hasn’t gotten an interview from him in _years,_ but she doesn’t question her opportunity. Bruce gives her an address, someplace in Gotham, and tells her to meet him there. Once again, Lois doesn’t question him--out loud--and agrees.

 

So she finds herself driving to the address the next Saturday. It’s a nice day, sunny for Gotham terms. Lois arrives at her destination, and draws up short. She had been expecting a restaurant, or maybe a side office, but she wasn’t expecting a playground. Lois pulls into the parking lot and checks her phone. Yup, this is the place. Lois grabs her stuff and leaves her car, puzzled. Why a playground? Is Bruce messing with her? It doesn’t matter, because Lois is a _fantastic_ reporter and she doesn’t care where her interviews are.

 

Lois marches towards the playground, where a bunch of kids are playing and chasing each other, and a big man is herding some of them, and Lois surveys the man, because he could be Bruce, right? Bruce has kids. But then she hears a voice say, “Over here, Miss Lane,” and Lois turns to see Bruce at a picnic table, looking bored.

 

She walks over to him and sits down.

 

“Sorry if I’m late,” she says. “I wasn’t sure this was the right spot.”

 

“Yes, giving you the wrong address is exactly the silly thing I might do,” Bruce says. “But I didn’t.”

 

“Right,” Lois says. She opens her notebook and sets up the recording app on her phone, then pulls the pen out from behind her ear. “Ready?”

 

“Sure,” Bruce says, and Lois starts the recording and the interview.

 

Bruce, as usual, does a good job of doing a bad job of answering her questions. Lois was expecting that, and she’s dealt with him before, so she asks a lot of straightforward questions and follow up questions.

 

The interview’s going pretty well when one of the kids on the playground screams and Bruce’s head whips over to face them, half standing up. Lois turns, too, to see the big man kneel before a little boy with dark hair. It looks like the boy fell off of the monkey bars. Two other dark haired boys are standing around him and the big man. It looks like the man is giving the boy a bandaid or two. The little boy stands up and wipes his tears off his face. The man turns and flashes Bruce a thumbs-up. This is Lois’s first clear shot at the other man’s face and he seems familiar. Bruce nods at the man and sits back down.

 

“Now where were we?” Bruce asks.

 

“Um, are those your kids?” Lois asks in return.

 

“Some of them are.”

 

“Okay,” Lois says, then she changes the subject back to Bruce’s potential three way partnership with LexCorp and Queen Industries.

 

This, too, goes fairly well (considering the stoicness of Bruce and the stubbornness of Lois) until it is also interrupted.

 

“Daaaaadd,” a little girl’s voice says, and Lois turns to see a blonde girl about six or seven years old holding a little boy who couldn’t be older than two. She’s shuffling towards them.

 

“Daaadd,” she says again.

 

“Stephanie, I told you I’m working,” Bruce says.

 

“I know, but Clark went to th’ bathroom with Dick and Tim, and I need a grownup,” the little blonde explains. Bruce sighs.

 

“What do you need?”

 

“Well,” Stephanie starts, adjusting her grip on the little boy, who is glaring at Lois or Bruce, Lois can’t tell who. “Damian wants Dick, and Dick’s at th’ bathroom, and I can’t hold him _forever,[because I hafta swing with Cass and Babs](http://almondrose-stuff.tumblr.com/post/148116243386/fan-art-of-my-own-fic-haha-rosie-what-a-nerd?is_related_post=1)_.” Bruce sighs again and looks at the glaring little boy--Damian--and then at Lois, who shrugs (she knows nothing about kids), then at his son again.

 

“I’ll hold him,” he sighs, and reaches his hands out to Damian, who immediately starts wriggling and yelling, “NO!”

 

“It’s just until Dick gets back,” Bruce says with the patience of someone who has to deal with all of this regularly.

 

“NO!” Damian yells again. “Stay here!”

 

“But don’tcha want Dick?” Stephanie asked.

 

“Yes,” Damian said. “Stay here.”

 

“Do you think you could hold him until Dick gets back, then swing with Cass and Barbara?” Bruce asks. Stephanie looks thoughful.

 

“There’s a baby swing,” Stephanie says. “Dami, do you like baby swings?”

 

“Big swing,” Damian says, and Stephanie shakes her head and starts to walk off.

 

“No, silly, you’re a baby. So you need a baby swing.” Her voice trails off as they reach the swing set, where two girls, one around eleven or twelve and one around eight, are waiting.

 

“Forgive the wait, but I need to makes sure this doesn’t blow up,” Bruce says, and Lois watches the little girl approach the swings just as a dark haired boy runs up to them. Lois recognizes him as Dick Grayson, the oldest child of Bruce’s at age eleven, and the only one she’s seen in real life before now.  Lois vaguely remembers a magazine cover picture of all of them together, but Bruce Wayne’s kids weren’t exactly her business. All Lois could remember was that there was like six of them. Stephanie dumps Damian into Dick’s arms, and Dick runs off while Steph starts to swing with the other girls.

 

“Sorry about that,” Bruce says. “Shall we continue?”

 

“Yeah,” Lois says, and she asks her next question.

 

When she has enough information, she starts to pack up and Bruce goes over to the playground to round up his kids. Lois watches him, the billionaire in an impeccable suit, pick up two boys horizontally and tuck them under his arms, the boys kicking and laughing. The big man carries Stephanie and the little dark haired girl on his shoulders, and Dick holds Damian still and followed with the red haired girl. Lois gathers her stuff quickly and stands up so it doesn’t  look like she was watching them. She waves as they walk by, and Lois realizes super belatedly that the big man is _Clark Kent._ Her best friend. Her big missed-opportunity as a boyfriend. Her best friend who she almost dated who has a _boyfriend in Gotham._

 

Lois drops her notebook in shock.

 

The red haired girl swoops down and picks it up.

 

“Here,” she says.

 

“Thanks,” Lois responds dazedly and she tucks her notebook under her arm.

 

“Bye Lois,” Clark says, smiling. “See you on Monday.”

 

“Yeah,” Lois says, and there is a chorus of “Bye Miss Lane” ‘s from the kids. Bruce echoes the sentiment and smirks at her, and the Waynes walk away, with Lois standing, shocked, by the picnic table.

 

“Hey Dad, can Babs spend the night?”

 

“Yeah, can she?”

 

“Does she want to?”

 

“Definitely.”

 

“Then we can ask her dad.”

  
“Yay!”

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! Hope you enjoyed! comments/kudos welcome
> 
> come check me out on tumblr! I am almondrose-stuff
> 
> the picture linked is my own art.


End file.
